Sunday, September 27, 2015

Taste Of Something New...

It was a tough call but it seems like I already have the decision made up... I'm kinda worry that I might not be able to cope with the new company tradition since it was a small company... However, I told myself I should give it a try at least... You will never know that things might turn out to be better than it seems... I may not be the type of person being like to pushed around but somehow, if the person that pushing me gives me a good impression or I should say, using the right attitude to push me, then I will be very glad and happier with it...

I have never experience this type of new environment and I am still nervous about it... Nonetheless, decision must be made and once it has been made, there is no turning bad... So far I can see the good things by joining this new company... It will never be dull like what I'm doing in my current company right now... Not because I am bored of my job but more like bored of the system that I have been doing...

Hopefully, this big jump will give me a better experience on what a software company should look like... Whether I enjoy or dislike this company, is another story and it will be the next challenge later...



Aiyooooo... Kepala mau pecah lah think like that... Haishhhh...

Friday, September 25, 2015

I Wonder...

Since they offer me, is it weird if I start negotiating about my salary tomorrow??? Feels kinda weird to talk about my offer letter outside of an office to me... Like seriously... However, one thing for sure... I should have prepare my checklist on what I should ask for tomorrow... I never expect them to get back to me this quick (usually people takes 2 weeks to do so right???) and seems like I'm not ready yet... I haven't even calculate my overall expenditure as well... How am I gonna negotiate like that!!!

It has been 4 years and I notice that I am not progressing much in my current company... I may tend to learn some new things once in a while but will I be able to cope with the learning process in this new company??? Somehow I doubt about my own capability but I don't know since I never try before... It makes me sounded like an asshole to be like "Oh I will do this" and ended up "I just can't figure it out" later... If it happen once or twice it will be fine but what if it happens all the time??? And I feel bad if I am going to work for a year and go away due to my incompetent mental state... It makes me feel like they hired me for doing nothing much somehow... Plus don't forget they are having some profit sharing bonus with all the other employees... If one did badly, the others will be dragged along...

I am kinda eager to experience a different environment and at the same time, being haunted by the fact that I may not do well... Especially when they have high expectation on me and I might let them down when they know the truth... I am really unsure if this decision to take the offer is the right choice but to be honest, my heart to this current company is no longer strong since the day I was promoted to senior... Too much things happened that strongly impact my decision as well...

The main dilemma that I have to face right now actually is the year end bonus in my current company... For sure if I leave, my one year bonus will just disappear like that... But if I do not take this offer, will there be another chance to get a similar offer like this??? To be frank, I need the bonus quite much as I have a huge amount of debt to get rid of... My financial state has been unstable since last year... Will the new job helps me in financial if I accept it now??? Will everything be different once I accept it now???

Tomorrow's discussion will be my final decision... Yes or no is the answer that will be revealed...



Alas, the choice is in my hand... I am still in serious dilemma right now =.=



Monday, September 21, 2015

Penang Trip During Weekend...

It was a very short trip but it was totally what I love about it... A trip where you don't need to think about working or doing anything besides relaxing... It was totally worth it... The hotel was lovely although it was quite pricey... The food was good and most importantly, cheaper by a lot...

Took some lovely pictures but unfortunately, I can't share it through mobile blogging... But I will try to find a way to upload it later...

Will be planning another trip to Penang... The next trip should be longer (not just 2 days) and hopefully we can do and eat more things...



After this long holiday, I have to decide the next vital decision of my life... But before that, all I can do is just to wait for the offer first... I am getting extremely nervous, happy, panic, and dilemma at the same time...

Friday, September 18, 2015

Biggest Decision...

All this time I feel like what was given to me are all granted without me doing anything... But this time, I need to make the right decision, with my own hand and with my own will... Should I ever get offered for the new job, I believe it will change my life a lot... Not sure if the working environment suits me but one thing for sure: tough!!! It will be something I never experience before...

I will say I'm not ready for this but opportunity does not come twice... Hence, my decision is the most important thing right now and no one else can butt into it... I gotta say though... I am very well prepared for this and it seems like I've got my decision made :)



Need to do some calculation LOLZ!!!

Friday, September 11, 2015

Lost...

My goals and dreams starts to fade again... The efforts I put in does not seems to give me any results I want... Not even a tiny bit... Although there are still opportunities coming, but I just can't feel the hype or urge to do my best for it anymore... I may sound like giving up... Not because I lost hope in myself or not confident enough... The truth is, the feeling of being in a family doesn't mean anything to me now... I would really choose to live alone at any cost... It makes me feel more comfortable instead... I really do not know what else I can do to make this family a happier family like how we used to be... And this is one of the reason that actually brings all the depressions to me...



How long will this continues???